Yes, masculinity can be toxic, but so can femininity

At this year’s Screen Actors Guild awards, 87-year-old actress Jane Fonda accepted a lifetime achievement award and made a politically charged speech. Unlike most of her fellow stars, however, Fonda did not take up one pet cause — instead, she got right to the heart of the deep cultural polarization that ails us.
After noting that actors must learn to empathize with those they are portraying on screen, Fonda declared: “Make no mistake, empathy is not weak or woke.”
Fonda is right: Empathy is not weak — or woke. At least, not per se. It is best understood as the impulse and ability to feel and identify with the feelings of others. Correlated with agreeability, empathy is a characteristic disproportionately evinced by women.
Thoughtfully directed toward virtuous causes, empathy is an asset; it’s what makes many women quick to volunteer for noble causes and to help neighbors. What Fonda is really implying, though — and what today’s most vocal leftists uniformly believe — is that empathy is a virtue unto itself when indiscriminately deployed on behalf of the systemically marginalized. Or, as Fonda put it: “Woke just means you give a damn about other people.”
This is the false belief that makes today’s elite left and its predominantly educated, female adherents so out of touch with everyday Americans — and, as I have written, so apt to hurt the very people they purport to help. For example, in the name of fighting institutionalized racism, they agitate to eliminate the tools of law and order that majorities of people of every demographic are depending upon to keep them safe.
Or, for another example, they welcome male athletes claiming a transgender identity onto female teams, and thereby endanger and disenfranchise the women for whom those teams exist.
As shown in polls assessing Americans’ political views, a vastly disproportionate number of the people politicizing ideologically differentiated empathy in this way are women. It would be fair, then, to term this baseless glorification of misguided empathy “toxic femininity.” After all, it is an exact inverse of the toxic masculinity displayed by infantile or misogynistic men — only displayed by infantile or misandrist women instead.
Toxic masculinity is best understood as the glorification of indiscriminate aggression. Just as women are on average predisposed to greater empathy, men are on average predisposed to greater aggression. Yes, these traits exist for men and women on overlapping bell curves — the most aggressive women are indeed more aggressive than the least aggressive men. Nevertheless, just as virtually all of the people at the tail end of the distribution for empathy are female, virtually all of the people at the tail end of the distribution for aggression are male.
Like the predominantly female predisposition to empathy, the predominantly male predisposition to aggression is a morally neutral fact. It is how one directs aggression that determines its virtue or its toxicity. The violent criminal and the protector who apprehends him are typically both male — and both exhibiting prototypically male aggression.
The real question is not whether most men will always be more aggressive than most women. They will. The question is whether men maintain control over their aggression and harness it to achieve, protect and serve, rather than to menace, assault or mock. It is the reflexive celebration of aggression, regardless of circumstance, that can indeed make masculinity toxic.
Femininity can be made similarly toxic by the ideological deployment of empathy. The question is not whether most women will be more empathetic than most men. They will. The question is whether women develop mastery over that empathy and harness it to compliment reason, order and responsibility, rather than to patronize, excuse or tokenize.
Socioeconomically underprivileged minority kids aren’t doing as well on standardized tests, and are getting suspended at higher rates for misbehavior?
Toxic femininity says: Eliminate the tests and institute restorative justice policies (thereby guaranteeing weaker academic attainment among these students and devolution of order in their school) in a fact-free profession of virtuous empathy.
But adult womanhood says: Find better options and motivation for test prep, ratchet the discipline up until it becomes an effective deterrent to most misbehavior, and expel the incorrigible out of righteous empathy for those who want to learn.
Males identifying as transgender feel marginalized and uncomfortable playing on the men’s team? Toxic femininity says to let them play on the women’s team — thereby depriving female athletes of the safe and fair competition that women’s sports were instituted to offer — in deference to the trendy cause of protecting transgender rights.
But adult womanhood says that sex is a biological fact, not a subjective identity, and that women’s teams are for women. This in no way infringes on the legal rights of people who identify as transgender, and who should of course be treated with equal dignity. Dignity does not entail blind deference.
For those who preach politicized empathy like Fonda, identification with the feelings of the student who never does her homework, the kid who hit another student, or the trans woman athlete is an indicator of personal virtue. What about empathy for the student motivated to study because of the standardized test, the kid being victimized by troublemakers, or the female athlete who loses her roster spot to a biological male? Well, that’s not so virtuous.
This amoral illogic is lazy, self-aggrandizing and infantile. In these empathy-addled, toxically feminine little girls masquerading as grown women, the toxically masculine little boys masquerading as grown men get exactly the enemies they deserve.
What about the rest of us, though? We deserve better.
Elizabeth Grace Matthew writes about books, education, and culture, including on Substack.
-
16 Best Gifts for Men, Manly Men, and Menly Man Men (2025)
When you need something that's as unnecessarily masculinized as you can get for the Man™ in your life, we have you covered.Wired - 1d -
How the A-MEM framework supports powerful long-context memory so LLMs can take on more complicated tasks
A-MEM uses embeddings and LLMs to create dynamic memory notes that automatically link to create complex knowledge structures.VentureBeat - Mar. 5 -
Crocs Are Coming To Fortnite So You Can Ensure Foot Comfort For Optimus Prime
Forget the back bling and iconic skins. Is your character comfortable enough in Fortnite? Because if not, the battle-royale game has teased Crocs are coming with the latest update . For those ...GameSpot - 5d -
'They told me to go play, so I go play.' Austin Reaves can carry the Lakers when asked
On the second night of a back-to-back, and without four starters, Austin Reaves produced 37 points, 13 assists, eight rebounds and four steals against the Nuggets.Yahoo Sports - 1d -
Lewis Hamilton is a driver ‘reborn’ at Ferrari – so can he make history with an eighth title?
NEW F1 SEASON: Speaking to ex-Ferrari drivers and personnel ahead of Hamilton’s Scuderia debut in Australia this weekend, Kieran Jackson takes a deep dive into the biggest transfer in F1 history ...Yahoo Sports - 1d -
Can Donald Trump afford a trade war with Canada?
And can Elon Musk afford a tumble in Tesla's share price?BBC News - 4d -
How can daylight saving time impact your health?
Changing the clocks can, of course, impact your sleep. But that can lead to more problems, experts warn.The Hill - Mar. 8 -
How Entrepreneurs Can Leverage Uncertainty for Growth
Entrepreneurs can use empathy to find the canary in the coal mine and exploit it for profits and intangible gains.Inc. - Mar. 8 -
'Underperforming' Man Utd can 'change Ratcliffe's mind'
Manchester United head coach Ruben Amorim says "underperforming" squad can change Sir Jim Ratcliffe's opinion.BBC News - 4d -
Measles Can Damage the Immune System for Years
An infection can also leave children and adults with other long-term health problems.The New York Times - 3d -
Cushing: We've shown we can compete
Nick Cushing says he's seen enough in City's League Cup final defeat to know we can present a real challenge to Chelsea in our upcoming fixtures.City had deservedly levelled just after the hour ...Yahoo Sports - 1d -
Why Olympic medalist Omari Jones’ path to becoming ‘America’s next boxing superstar’ will be so difficult
2024 bronze medalist Omari Jones is the latest American boxer who will attempt turning Olympic success into professional dollars. But with the way the sport is changing, can the old formula still ...Yahoo Sports - 2d -
Carney talks tough on Trump threat - but can he reset relations?
Canada's next PM, who described the US as a "country we can no longer trust", will need to work with the US president.BBC News - Mar. 10 -
Can English teams win all three European competitions?
With five teams in the quarter-finals, can English sides win all three European competitions this season?Yahoo Sports - 3d -
Here's how you can watch Friday's MSU-Oregon basketball game
Here's how you can watch Big Ten Tournament matchup between Michigan State and Oregon on Friday.Yahoo Sports - 3d -
Here's how you can watch Saturday's MSU-Wisconsin basketball game
Here's how you can watch Big Ten Tournament matchup between Michigan State and Wisconsin on SaturdayYahoo Sports - 2d -
How Entrepreneurs Can Turn Their Voice Into a Powerful Career Tool
Leaders can refine and develop their voice to command attention, build trust, and boost professional credibility.Inc. - 16h -
Is Elon Musk’s Tesla EV Party Over?
Tesla’s stock defied gravity for years. How long it can keep doing so remains up in the air.Inc. - 6d -
US had productive talks with Putin over Ukraine war, Trump says
But Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky accuses Russia of dragging out ceasefire talks so it can continue the war.BBC News - 2d -
2025 NCAA Tournament schedule: March Madness bracket, game dates, locations, tip times, TV channels
Check out the master schedule for the NCAA Tournament so you can watch all the March Madness 2025 actionCBS Sports - 6h -
Can Tennessee basketball reach Final Four in March Madness bracket? Our prediction
Can Tennessee basketball reach NCAA bracket’s Final Four? Our 2025 March Madness predictions show how Vols can make run in tournament.Yahoo Sports - 8h -
Can Vanderbilt basketball reach Sweet 16 in March Madness bracket? Our prediction
Can Vanderbilt basketball reach NCAA bracket’s Sweet 16? Our 2025 March Madness predictions show how Commodores can make run in tournament.Yahoo Sports - 6h -
Why Louisville can make a deep run in our 2025 March Madness bracket predictions
Can Louisville basketball reach the Final Four? Our 2025 March Madness bracket predictions show how the Cards can make a run in the NCAA Tournament.Yahoo Sports - 5h -
Cheltenham festival day one tips: Brighterdaysahead can upset Constitution Hill in Champion Hurdle
The favourite has seen off every challenge in all his races, but could be facing his sternest opponent so far. Constitution Hill has seen off every challenge with ease in winning all 10 of his ...The Guardian - 6d -
Can win vs. Panthers, Zadorov's fight with Bennett spark Bruins?
The Bruins earned a huge comeback win over the rival Panthers on Tuesday. Whether they can use it to spark a run to the playoffs remains to be seen.Yahoo Sports - 4d -
Lakers' Bronny James can see on-court improvement during rookie year
Lakers guard Bronny James said he can see improvement within his game after logging a season-high 15 minutes in a loss to the Nuggets.Yahoo Sports - 1d -
😳 Can this really happen? Union fans tear Musiala's jersey.
This article was translated into English by Artificial Intelligence. You can read the original version in 🇩🇪 here.That Jamal Musiala is hardly stoppable in the Bundesliga with fair means is alre...Yahoo Sports - 21h -
Best seat in the house: writer Geoff Dyer on why sitting in a corner is so satisfying
The author always sits in the corner of a room but doesn’t understand why. Do some people crave the solace of the corner more than others? He finds clues to the compulsion in his upbringing – and ...The Guardian - Mar. 9 -
Steve Jobs Hired a High-Schooler to Write the First Mac Guide. Here’s How You Can Use AI to Follow His Example
A variety of AI services like ChatGPT can improve your business’s readability.Inc. - 2d -
What do women really want from men? I delved into romantasy and found a good few clues | Max Fletcher
In these novels, the heroes are – to borrow a term from the fandom – cinnamon rolls: soft-hearted, sweet and, yes, delicious. Feyre Archeron has many talents: she can skin a wolf and track a deer, ...The Guardian - Mar. 8 -
Can Vanderbilt reach Sweet 16 in Women’s March Madness? Predictions for why and why not
Can the Vanderbilt women’s basketball team reach the Sweet 16? Our 2025 March Madness bracket predictions show how it can make an NCAA Tournament run.Yahoo Sports - 5h -
How canned water brand Liquid Death made its mark
If you watched the Super Bowl last month, you might have seen the first national ad for Liquid Death, the canned water company that promises to "murder your thirst." Founder and CEO Mike Cessario ...CBS News - Mar. 8 -
Can Mark Carney, Canada’s New Leader, Take on Trump and His Tariffs?
Mark Carney will most likely be in power just a few weeks before a federal election is held. To win, he will try to convince Canadians he can take on, but also negotiate with, Trump.The New York Times - 6d -
Eddie Howe: Carabao Cup win can be turning point for Newcastle United
Eddie Howe believes winning the Carabao Cup can be a “turning point” in the history of Newcastle United. Dan Burn and Alexander Isak scored either side of the interval to give the Magpies a deser...Yahoo Sports - 14h -
Trump’s energy chief says US shale can ‘drill, baby, drill’ at low oil price
Chris Wright claims industry can raise output even if crude falls to $50 a barrel as administration has suggestedFinancial Times - Mar. 10 -
Touring Italy’s ‘Motor Valley,’ Where You Can Drive Ferraris, Lamborghinis and More
In the country’s “Motor Valley,” racecar enthusiasts can admire, and even drive, Maseratis, Lamborghinis, Ferraris and more.The New York Times - 3d -
The risks of AI-generated code are real — here’s how enterprises can manage the risk
AI generated code is set to dominate application development. Here's what enterprises can do now to lower the risk.VentureBeat - 2d -
Here's how you can watch Saturday's MSU-Notre Dame Big Ten Tournament hockey game
Michigan State hockey battles Notre Dame on Saturday in the Big Ten Tournament - here's how you can watch this matchupYahoo Sports - 2d -
The ‘secret’ agents of super-prime property
In the rarefied world of the most expensive homes, where discretion is everything and sales can be a magnet to opportunists, a clutch of under-the-radar agents is oh-so-quietly operatingFinancial Times - 2d
More from The Hill
-
Waltz: All options 'on the table' to ensure Iran does not have a nuclear weapon
National security adviser Mike Waltz said on Sunday that all options are “on the table” to prevent Iran from obtaining a nuclear weapon. In an interview on ABC News’s “This Week,” anchor Martha ...The Hill - 6h -
Crockett rips Fetterman for slamming her viral video: 'I don’t show up in hoodies'
Rep. Jasmine Crockett (D-Texas) fired back at Sen. John Fetterman (D-Pa.) after he criticized as “bizarre” a widely circulated “choose-your-fighter” TikTok video featuring several Democratic ...The Hill - 7h -
Waltz confirms US airstrikes 'took out' multiple Houthi leaders
National security adviser Mike Waltz confirmed on Sunday that U.S. airstrikes “took out” multiple Houthi leaders in attacks this weekend. Asked how the U.S. attacks this weekend differ from strikes ...The Hill - 8h -
Trump says he was 'being a little bit sarcastic' when he promised to end Ukraine war in 24 hours
President Trump said on Sunday he was “being a little bit sarcastic” when he pledged to end the war between Ukraine and Russia in 24 hours. In a Sunday broadcast of “Full Measure,” Trump was ...The Hill - 10h -
Democratic Party’s favorability hits record low: Poll
The Democratic Party’s favorability rating has hit a record low, according to a CNN survey released Sunday. The survey, conducted March 6-9, shows 54 percent of surveyed U.S. adults say they have ...The Hill - 10h
More in Politics
-
‘Full of despair’: Senate Dems look to regroup after losing shutdown fight
Democrats are openly questioning whether they lost their last point of leverage by ceding to Republicans in the latest skirmish over funding the government.Politico - 1h -
Waltz: All options 'on the table' to ensure Iran does not have a nuclear weapon
National security adviser Mike Waltz said on Sunday that all options are “on the table” to prevent Iran from obtaining a nuclear weapon. In an interview on ABC News’s “This Week,” anchor Martha ...The Hill - 6h -
Crockett rips Fetterman for slamming her viral video: 'I don’t show up in hoodies'
Rep. Jasmine Crockett (D-Texas) fired back at Sen. John Fetterman (D-Pa.) after he criticized as “bizarre” a widely circulated “choose-your-fighter” TikTok video featuring several Democratic ...The Hill - 7h -
Waltz confirms US airstrikes 'took out' multiple Houthi leaders
National security adviser Mike Waltz confirmed on Sunday that U.S. airstrikes “took out” multiple Houthi leaders in attacks this weekend. Asked how the U.S. attacks this weekend differ from strikes ...The Hill - 8h -
New poll shows Trump with highest job approval, but early challenges on the economy
A new NBC News poll shows President Trump with a job approval rating as high as he’s ever had. But doubts loom in voters' minds, especially over the economy and government cuts. NBC News’ Yamiche ...NBC News - 9h