Jarren Duran's path to batting leadoff for the Boston Red Sox, being named the 2024 All-Star Game MVP and jump-starting his earning potential by signing a one-year, $3.75-million contract with a club option for $8 million in 2026 has been anything but linear.
The former Cal State Long Beach and Cypress High outfielder is open about his mental health struggles that have included a verbal outburst toward a fan, wearing a T-shirt with a profane message and — most concerning for Duran and his loved ones — depression and a suicide attempt in 2022.
Interviewed for an eight-part Netflix docuseries "The Clubhouse: A Year With the Red Sox" that will premiere Tuesday, Duran said he was so hard on himself that he did not want to live.
"I was already hearing it from fans," Duran said in the docuseries. "And what they said to me, [it was like], 'I've told myself 10 times worse in the mirror.' That was a really tough time for me. I didn't even want to be here anymore."
The 28-year-old described the moment he nearly killed himself in frighteningly stark terms.
"I got to a point where I was sitting in my room, I had my rifle and I had a bullet and I pulled the trigger and the gun clicked, but nothing happened," he said. "So, to this day, I think God just didn't let me take my own life because I seriously don't know why it didn't go off. I took it as a sign of, I might have to be here for a reason, so that's when I started to look myself in the mirror after the gun didn't go off.
"I was like, 'Do I want to be here, or do I not want to be here?' That happened for a reason and obviously you're here for a reason, so let's be the way you want to be and play [the way] you want to play and live the way you want to live."
Read more:Red Sox suspend Jarren Duran for yelling anti-gay slur at fan. He shows up in NSFW T-shirt
Duran enjoyed a breakout season in 2024, leading the American League in doubles (48), triples (14), plate appearances (735) and at-bats (671). He batted .285 with 191 hits, 111 runs scored, 21 home runs and 34 stolen bases.
His ascent began in 2023 when he hit .295 with 24 stolen bases in 102 games after being recalled from triple A, and coincided with his newfound resolve.
"Jarren's decision to share his story is an act of courage that reaches far beyond baseball," Red Sox president and Chief Executive Sam Kennedy said in a statement. "By opening up, he's showing others who may be struggling that they're not alone and that asking for help isn't just OK, it's essential.
"Every ...