Who’s on the November naughty-and-nice list?

Reports of industry lobbyists literally lining up to talk with Donald Trump at Mar-a-Lago or figuratively lining up to speak with Joe Biden and Kamala Harris remind me of wonderful days years ago, when I stood in line with my young children at the local mall, waiting to have a heart-to-heart talk with Santa.

Paid to understand how business gets done in Washington, some lobbyists are just as sure that Santa Claus is coming to town.

The similarities don’t end there. Everyone waiting in line knows exactly when the big day is, whether it is Dec. 25 or Nov. 5.

Not only that, but they all understand leverage. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, children fret about Santa checking his list “twice to see who had been naughty or nice.” And in the weeks surrounding an election, business lobbyists fret about which side of the winning candidate’s naughty-or-nice ledger they may be listed on.

Of course, we don’t know which candidate will end up with the ability to put on the red suit. That complicates things. It’s a close race, and both Trump and Harris seem intent on giving some businesses or industries a leg up and others a lump of coal for one reason or another. Any smart lobbyist will want to appeal to whomever wins, and thus there are lots of people eager to have a heart-to-heart with one or both candidates.

Indeed, there may be far more who believe in the Trump or Harris Santa than in old St. Nick himself … if only the right one could win.

And yes, Donald and Kamala are listening. That is what the last days of the campaigns are about. Candidates up and down the ballot want to know what it will take to make “visions of sugar plums dance” in the heads of those who might lend critical support in a neck-and-neck race.

We need not doubt the sincerity of any politician’s positions to acknowledge that those packing the sled think about who’s been nice. Sleds are being loaded with promises as we speak: student loan forgiveness, tax cuts, protection from competition and price gouging, regulatory relief to unleash everything from homebuilding to vaping, more subsidized housing and daycare and bringing an end to a so-called “invasion” of criminals coming to our shores.

And what about the other guys, the “naughty” ones? For this unfortunate group, the competing candidates use different words. They talk about morons, idiots, the enemy within, the unhinged, the antichrist. They refer to their political adversaries as garbage or fascists who seek to destroy democracy.

With rhetoric like that, it’s no wonder every one of us hopes to avoid being placed on the new president’s naughty list. The rough language alone is enough to avoid Santa’s glance.

Sadly, there’s little goodwill and cheer to be found when politeness all but leaves the political lexicon. For now, at least, it’s gone by the wayside in favor of “locker-room language” that makes a candidate seem “real” or relatable, or ever-intensifying rhetoric that partisan voters tolerate because they too can’t stand the other side.

In earshot of our children’s Santa conversations, we parents always did our best to make good. We also knew we would pay for whatever Santa left by the chimney. The same is true for political conversations that happen out of earshot.

Yes, there will be arguments about how subsidies, tax breaks and other gifts given to a narrow selection of industries will grow the economy for everyone else, but it will be the so-called forgotten men and women who will pay the bill. Believing otherwise requires almost as much faith as it takes to believe in Santa.

Yet in some form, Santa Claus is coming to town. Let’s hope that we taxpayers will be considered alongside the businesses and special interests who have been nice!

Bruce Yandle is a distinguished adjunct fellow with the Mercatus Center at George Mason University and dean emeritus of the Clemson University’s College of Business and Behavioral Sciences.