The one change that worked: I set my phone to ‘do not disturb’ three years ago – and have never looked back
WhatsApp notifications in the middle of the night were the final straw. I switched those off – and every other alert – and it helped my wellbeing, sleep and parenting
My phone vibrates itself awake, disturbing my baby, who has only just dropped off after an hour of my shushing in the hazy, sepia-toned dark of the early hours. It’s a WhatsApp message from a mum friend. Another buzz signals another message. And then another one. Everyone is up. Everyone – and every baby – is sleepless. Everyone is typing.
My own baby cries as I turn over in bed to soothe him, flicking open my messages to catch up on the gossip as I do so. One mum is asking about the right Calpol dosage for a teething nine-month-old, while another wants to know what time we’re meeting tomorrow. Someone else has forwarded a syrupy-sweet Instagram reel about motherhood and the power of women, and her friend has replied with a supportive: “We can do this, mamas!” But I don’t feel powerful and, right now, I really can’t do this. It’s 3.07am. I’m tired, overwhelmed and, thanks to the glaring blue light of my phone and the adrenaline galloping through my body, wide awake.
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