My secret life as a model: ‘High fashion loved me most when I was visibly bony’

It is a world of 13-hour days, stressful castings and size 6 figures. Here is what it is like to navigate the big opportunities – and impossible demands

‘She was sitting at the kitchen table, eating raw cauliflower. For dinner.” It’s September 2024 in London and my friend is reflecting on her time sharing an apartment with fellow models in Paris the previous year. I am grimly amused, but unsurprised. This is the type of story models are always telling.

I would know, because I became a model at 21 – quite late, by industry standards – and have walked in several London shows, as well as fittings, showrooms, campaigns, editorials, lookbooks and e-commerce for brands such as Moncler, Lacoste and Toni & Guy. Since I started, I have tried to build a thick skin to protect myself against rejections from castings and call-backs, as well as the ubiquitous skinny body standard. But when I get selected for a show, there is always the underlying fear that perhaps I took it too far – that I lost too much weight again. Because an overwhelming proportion of models are, as they have always been, very thin.

Topics

A moment that changed me: I was an excruciatingly shy teenager. Then Courtney Love roared into my life

I swapped my drab clothes for charity-shop nightdresses, highlighted my hair with Sun In – and realised I didn’t need to apologise for being angry. I had no tribe during my first three years of ...
The Guardian - 1d
A moment that changed me: Crohn’s left me in constant pain. An operation restored my appetite for life

Eating with my family was a source of joy and pleasure until illness ravaged my digestive system. After my stoma was fitted, everything tasted amazing again. Growing up, I always loved food. On ...
The Guardian - Mar. 12
I negotiated a $54,000 sign-on bonus at Amazon—now I run a business helping people negotiate salary. Here’s my best advice

Most people wait too long to negotiate their salary, says personal finance and career expert Jasmine McCall. Here's how she landed a $54,000 bonus at Amazon — on top of a 6-figure salary and ...
CNBC - 1d
I adore my children. I’m also scared that one day my son will kill me

In the UK, more than 170 women have been murdered by their sons in the past 15 years. An anonymous mother reveals what it is like to be frightened of your child while desperately wanting to support ...
The Guardian - Mar. 8
‘This woman destroyed my heart and soul’: After my wife died, her mother turned on me — and presented me with a secret will

“She flipped a switch and instantly my wife’s entire family hated me.”
MarketWatch - 9h
This story isn’t about the priest who abused me. It’s about my mother

She was a master archivist of lies, enabling my stepfather’s crimes against me and my siblings. Despite everything, I needed to believe she loved me. The church, though aware of our abuser’s ...
The Guardian - Mar. 11
I was always terrified of confrontation. Then I hit my 40s | Arwa Mahdawi

If I see someone making my neighbourhood a worse place to live, I walk straight up to them and … have a little word. What is happening to me?. Some people buy sports cars when they have a midlife ...
The Guardian - 2d
‘Modern Love’ Podcast: Natasha Rothwell on Figuring Out What She Wants In a Relationship

Natasha Rothwell, a star of “The White Lotus,” on what it took to figure out what she wanted in a relationship.
The New York Times - 1d
What I Found on the 365-Mile Trail of a Lost Folk Hero

The Old Leatherman, a sort of real-life Northeastern Sasquatch, gave me an excuse to step outside my own life.
The New York Times - Mar. 9

My secret life as a model: ‘High fashion loved me most when I was visibly bony’

Topics

Related

A moment that changed me: I was an excruciatingly shy teenager. Then Courtney Love roared into my life

A moment that changed me: Crohn’s left me in constant pain. An operation restored my appetite for life

I negotiated a $54,000 sign-on bonus at Amazon—now I run a business helping people negotiate salary. Here’s my best advice

I adore my children. I’m also scared that one day my son will kill me

‘This woman destroyed my heart and soul’: After my wife died, her mother turned on me — and presented me with a secret will

This story isn’t about the priest who abused me. It’s about my mother

I was always terrified of confrontation. Then I hit my 40s | Arwa Mahdawi

‘Modern Love’ Podcast: Natasha Rothwell on Figuring Out What She Wants In a Relationship

What I Found on the 365-Mile Trail of a Lost Folk Hero

More from The Guardian

Thousands protest in Israel over ‘attack on democracy’ by Netanyahu

EU ready to impose more sanctions on Russia after summit talks

Tesla backer says Musk must reduce Trump work, as 46,000 Cybertrucks recalled

Kirsty Coventry elected first female president of IOC as Coe routed in vote

US man released after being held by Taliban for more than two years

More in World

Starmer shifts from boots on the ground in Ukraine to air and sea defence

Starmer shifts from boots on the ground in Ukraine to air and sea defence

Republican Ex-Candidate Is Convicted in Shooting Plot Targeting New Mexico Democrats

Republican Ex-Candidate Is Convicted in Shooting Plot Targeting New Mexico Democrats

Nicola Sturgeon Cleared After Police Investigation Into SNP Finances